View Full Version : How Much Time Do You Waste Taking A Dump?
Big Dave
02-23-2013, 09:54 AM
Lately I've been stuck in this routine of taking a shit shortly after getting to work, about 8:30 in the morning, and it takes me around a half hour to push it all out. The consitency is like a foamy rubber cement. Sticky, nasty stuff. My diet is well-balanced, I don't understand what the deal is. Any suggestions? I'm sick of wasting this much time, it leads to a very unproductive morning. Plus my legs go numb from sitting on the shitter too long.
Jarid in Cedar
02-23-2013, 09:56 AM
Increase your fiber.
Waste? Not a minute. It's the 15 mins a day of me time.
OrangeUte
02-23-2013, 10:46 AM
0 - thanks to my iPhone.
Devildog
02-23-2013, 10:54 AM
I had an old Gunnery Sergeant once that used to comment, that in his opinion... Sex was overrated, and that taking a healthy dump was highly underrated and was very satisfying.
FN Phat
02-23-2013, 11:50 AM
Waste? Not a minute. It's the 15 mins a day of me time.
Amen. With four kids and a wifey in the house, it is the only place that I can get 15 minutes of peace.
hostile
02-23-2013, 06:39 PM
As much time as I can.
Brian
03-01-2013, 06:51 AM
Please feel free to use the precision offered by the Bristol Stool Chart in our future feces related conversations.
231
480ute
03-01-2013, 07:03 AM
My rule, keep ass firmly planted on the throne until at least one foot has fallen asleep. It's that simple.
SgtUte
03-01-2013, 08:26 AM
Metamucil daily as a fiber supplement. Works great and the clean-up is quick/easy!
480ute
03-01-2013, 08:32 AM
Metamucil daily as a fiber supplement. Works great and the clean-up is quick/easy!
I've spoken at length about this on utefans, but if you have not invested in a bidet yet you are missing out. Best purchase I've made in my 33 years.
SgtUte
03-01-2013, 08:39 AM
Love a bidet, however can't plan on having one at various places throughout the day while I'm at work, which is where I'm getting paid to squat!
San Diego Ute Fan
03-01-2013, 09:14 AM
Please feel free to use the precision offered by the Bristol Stool Chart in our future feces related conversations.
231
For me, a number 4 almost every time. In and out in 2 minutes or less. Very little clean up.
I used to suffer as many of you are describing. The trick is 1/2 gallon of water between 9 to 5, plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables to go with your protein. You'll be golden.:)
LadyUte
03-01-2013, 09:33 AM
I can't believe I read this thread. haha
San Diego Ute Fan
03-01-2013, 10:28 AM
I can't believe I read this thread. haha
And you've always claimed that you're repulsed by this sort of talk. I call BS. No pun intended.
LadyUte
03-01-2013, 10:35 AM
And you've always claimed that your repulsed by this sort of talk. I call BS. No pun intended.
Only when EUf talks about it. He is disgusting. ha ha
Tacoma Ute
03-01-2013, 02:01 PM
I can't believe I read this thread. haha
This thread was started by one of mooses many identities. He's had at least 4 on this board already. He's probably reading this right now.
old_gregg
03-01-2013, 02:22 PM
waste? none. utilize efficiently? i don't know, however long it takes for a laptop to singe off leg hair.
LadyUte
03-01-2013, 02:28 PM
This thread was started by one of mooses many identities. He's had at least 4 on this board already. He's probably reading this right now.
I should have known.
Joe Public
03-01-2013, 02:55 PM
This thread was started by one of mooses many identities. He's had at least 4 on this board already. He's probably reading this right now.
Then he gets a C- for the wasted potential between the moniker "Big Dave" and some alternative details he could have chosen for his story.
wuapinmon
03-01-2013, 09:55 PM
It's my reading room.
SuperGabers
03-01-2013, 10:03 PM
It's my reading room.
Wuap!!!!!!
Sent from my MB865 using Tapatalk 2
hostile
03-01-2013, 10:25 PM
It's my reading room.
:highfive:
FMCoug
03-01-2013, 10:58 PM
I have a wife and 4 teen / pre-teen daughters. The throne is my refuge!
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